By Amy Dickinson
Dear Amy: I was snooping in my son’s basement and
discovered he is growing weed. Should I confront him? He could lose his
job, house, reputation and shared custody of his daughter.
I am a
nervous wreck thinking about how to approach him. My husband would have a
stroke if he found out. I know I should do something, but what?
Sad Mom
Dear Sad: Here’s what you should do: Stop snooping in your son’s basement.
Unless
he has a sophisticated commercial marijuana ranch down there, you
should assume this is for his own use, and leave it alone.
If you
absolutely cannot stand it and must confront him about this, you will
have to tell him the truth about your own behavior. One natural
consequence of your admission would be for him to stop trusting you.
If
you are ready to make this sacrifice, you should only urge him not to
expose his child to his marijuana growing and weed use. Obviously, if
you found this in the basement, so could she, and this would put his
daughter in an even worse position than you are in, because involving
her in this sort of secret could be ruinous for their relationship, and
disastrous down the line.
State laws regarding marijuana
cultivation seem to be quite convoluted. If he doesn’t have a license to
grow and is caught (by someone other than you) the consequences could
be extreme in proportion to his crime.
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